12.01.2009

The Eternal Dream of Bliss

I sit here swinging between two worlds. I met her, a practicing tantric and what a wonderful woman she turned out to be. She unraveled her life, a life that appeared to be a part of me. She sang her way through, she is the ultimate romantic. Just watching her is a pleasure. Just listening to her sweet words is an experience. Being with her brings me this uncanny joy and excitement I have never felt before. She once knew the real meaning of Bhairava, she once practiced Tantra.

With her presence my whole imaginary world of the Gods sprung back to life. The Lord reappeared into this intoxicating space. He lured me to this world of magic, of divinity and of such amazing charm that one could lie there swollen with love, paralyzed and drowning in bliss.

He breaks out of his stony shackles; he dances the wild dance of love. He awakens in me this strange frenzy that is waiting to just burst out of my contained human self. I am wild, I am free. I am that which you do not see. I am the eternal Bhairavi locked in this human temple for this life.

In this mystical realm, where all the Gods and celestial beings live, where charm and beauty are beyond the unthinkable, where intellect is pure and of superior nature, where the language of speech is that within the mind and where the essence of life is pure energy and love. There are no secrets, there is no good or bad, this is my world, the
celestial land of the dancing Gods.

Nataraja dances gracefully, his long locks sway in gentle waves in the wind. Parvati seated in divine charm, a golden glow that surrounds her envelopes my heart. Chamunda and Kali bring out their wilderness, such depth in their beauty, such warmth in their eyes, such power in their being I have never seen or felt.

Is this the real worship in my heart, are these the silent depths I ache to see, is this that mystical world I want to be a part of... O Divine Lord, how much longer do I wait to have a glimpse of your divine feet? To be a part of divine land, to take a dip every day at the Ganges, to feel the cold of the mountains, to breathe the silence of the cave, to bathe in the tranquility of life and to view the very Lord every day...Ah! What a life, what an eternal moment of joy.

My eternal home, by a small shrine made for the Lord, by a small kund that holds water so pure, by the walls of towering mountains. To live on sacred ground surrounded by Shiva lingams, to live under the shadow of the divine Trishula, to be a part of that charming archaic world in stone, to smell the pure air and listen to the reverberation of the temple bell echo around the hill side... what a life.

Photo courtesy:
James G. Lochtefeld
personal.carthage.edu

10 comments:

balaarjunan said...

Very thoughtful.
Love the last para esp.

JC said...

'I' am but a poor confused soul - because of repeated exposure to 'my' various exterior forms for over four billion years to apparent duality or multiplicity - that believably one day is surely going to lose 'my' independent identity in this form too, but have faith that this time 'I' will pass! And hopefully would merge with the formless Mother, the Eternal Bliss :)

JC said...

However, 'I' might also add that 'I' feel grateful to Her for permitting some time in this form too to share part of the believable 'bliss' while 'I' co8ld think of Her and share some of Her dreams of the past during Her journey from zero to infinity - must have been full of ups and downs, some small some big appearing when 'I' am told that the now beautiful earth once was a fire-ball to start with :)

Kavitha said...

Joshi uncle,

Depends which reality we live in :) there is beauty in the universe but how much time do we have to see it, there is beauty in bhairava - that which displays apparent madness, there is beauty in the poetry of Ravana who was believed to be a tyrannical demon king but when we read his poetry, he sounds like a child in love...

its all in the mind :) this apparent beauty... this apparent life.

Bart said...

Thist reads like an initiation, Kavitha, as if that older tantric lady transferred all her insights to you telepathically. I hope it will comes true, then we will read it back in your blogs and you will become to us what that lady has been to you!

And what a very sweet little temple your illustrative picture shows us. Even through the photo I can feel me there at home. Our bodies are temples too indeed, yes, but temples have been always build on holy grounds. Therefore our bodily temples functionate the best as well, when we are barefooted walking, standing, kneeling and so on holy soil cause In that situation we form the best connection between earth and heaven, which we are both.

JC said...

Kavitha, Yes, as essence of life someone said, "Beauty lies in the eye of the beholder. And, Shiva also believably is the beautiful most as stated in "Satyam Shivam Sunderam" and also 'Bholenath' (who burnt His own inferior images, Bhasmasur as well as Kamdev at some points in time before He eventually reached the end of Satya Yuga), the 'Simple God' in the beginning, but who, as Bhootnath, is now alone! There is no one besides Him except His innumerable images that fill the universal void (like 'my' own exclusive album that reflects the changes in my exterior in the present form, while 'I' remain 'I'!) reflecting the cross-section of Time from zero to infinity that He continues to review repeatedly for some reason known to Him only!

Who am 'I' then, simply in the words of the wiser images of Shiva, can be understood as a poorer or ignorant image and have to just believe that 'i' in reality is Him at some point in time in the 'past' :)

JC said...

Shri Bart, You are right that apparently there is a difference between one soil and another, depending on the loction (as my nose is different from my ears, but all body parts taken together represent 'me'!)...

As an engineer by profession (although retired from 'active service', just as when Shiva-Parvati retired, the control pased on to their sons Kartikeya and Ganesha so that none disturbs them!) in the present form, 'I' also know that even today (by coincidence, or by design!) the soil also is categorised predominantly as 'silty', 'sandy', and 'clayey'; and in rocks, sedimentary, metamorphic, 'igneous'...could remind a 'Hindu' by thought of the three-in-one God (Treyambakeshwar - famous temple located at Nashik, Maharashtra)...'I' could add that 'I' am perhaps lucky to have been born in Himachal Pradesh, although my parents belonged to the hills of Uttarakhand (Kumaon ie Kurmanchal region, related with Tortoise as the ssecond reincarnation of Vishnu!)...

"Hari anant....." ie God is unending...and so also His stories :)

Aswin Kini said...

You are so blessed to have a mind and soul ever focused on god. From this point, I can infer that the "Lady" has transferred or shared her spiritual knowledge with you which makes your mind even more blissful.

Alas, some people are not so fortunate, they have more mundane things to worry about :(

Aswin Kini said...

"My eternal home, by a small shrine made for the Lord, by a small kund that holds water so pure, by the walls of towering mountains. To live on sacred ground surrounded by Shiva lingams, to live under the shadow of the divine Trishula, to be a part of that charming archaic world in stone, to smell the pure air and listen to the reverberation of the temple bell echo around the hill side... what a life."-

Very very nice para, it reflects the dream of a Siva devotee who aspires to be in a place surrounded by Siva and Siva only.

Isn't Thiruvannamalai one such place?

JC said...

The 'wise ancients' reached the conclusion that the infinite external universe exists within the human form also - as its essence - expressed for common man as the essence of the 'Absolute Truth', "gagar mein sagar", ie, literally the entire ocean contained within a pitcher or vessel, which could perhaps be interpreted as referring to the 'governing vessel', the brain in humans: whose ruler is Moon, after due analysis of the ocean-like contents of the 'conception vessel' the ruler of which is the Sun located at the solar plexus, assisted by its two commanders Mars and Venus, besides other three soldiers too that form the defence force of Shhiva!...

However, human brain has been so designed as to make it tough to reach the 'Absolute Truth' easily, which is possible only when one has collected information that's sufficient to draw the essence 'reading between lines' from all ten directions ('Dashrath')...and, normally, 'one' stop when 'we' have perhaps reached only some 'Truth', as conveyed through, say, the character of Newton who modestly conveyed that what he had collected were just shiny pebbles and shells from the sea-shore while the entire sea still remained to be explored...