The spider and the elephant.

Thiruvanaikkaval, Srirangam: We would love to consider that we are super intelligent beings on this planet. Well let’s hold onto our egos a bit and take a look at this story.

There was once a vast forest that surrounded the interior lands around the Kaveri river in Trichy district. It was a forest rich with Jambu trees under one of which was installed a Shiva Linga. Back in the serene world that surrounded this Linga lived an elephant that used to come and worship the Lord every day. The elephant was an ardent devotee of the Lord.

At the same time there was yet another unassuming devotee who used to worship the Lord with as much devotion. A spider used to live around the shrine and tie a web above it so that the leaves from the Jambu tree would not fall on the Lord himself. But there was a problem for every time the spider made his web to protect the Lord, the elephant would destroy it thinking it was absolute sacrilege. This resulted in a mounting fight between the spider and the elephant, a massive clash of egos.

Finally the spider decided one day that it would not take this any more. The next day when the elephant came to worship the Lord he as usual decided to destroy the web the spider had spun over the Linga. This time the spider got smarter and entered into the elephant’s trunk and bit him. The following duel killed both the elephant and the spider. This is when Lord Shiva appeared before both of them, and said that they both had pleased him well with their devotion.

The spider in his next birth was born as King Kochchengan who built the current temple at Thiruvanaikkaval, in the island city of Srirangam to worship Lord Shiva. Interestingly, he built the sanctum sanctorum in such a way that no elephant would be able to enter the Gharbha Griha. Hence this is the only temple where the Garbha Griha is built low, has a very small vestibule (Antarala) and an even smaller chamber within which the Lingam resides. The entrance is extremely small such that no elephant can even find its way in. The only way to view the Lord is through a Jali window placed in front of Nandi, through which the Lord can be seen. It is considered very auspicious to be able to view the Lord through the horns of Nandi Bull through the Jali window.

The story of Lord Shiva’s temple at Thiruvanaikkaval does not end here; they say that even if the Kaveri river dries up in peak summer, the water within this shrine chamber never dries. There is water that surrounds this Linga the year round even if there is extreme heat around this area of interior Tamil Nadu. Such is the power of the Lord. This temple at Thiruvanakkaval is also called Jambukeswara temple as an extension of the Jambu tree under which the Linga was originally installed.

This is about Thiruvanaikkaval, there is more to the spider. Incase tomorrow you decide to clean up the spider webs in your Puja room, think twice before hitting the spiders. Spiders are great devotees of the Lord, and if there is serious devotion in your house, spiders will come and make webs within this section of the house. So next time you decide to clean up, leave the spiders alone!

Photo courtesy: templenet.com

Dvaita verses Advaita philosophy

Ramanuja says that in the age of Kaliyuga, a person can get moksha or salvation from bondage and hence the cycle of rebirth if he/she simply utters the words "Om Namo Narayanan". He also says this can be done with one sitting right in the middle of samsara bandhana (or what we call ties with family life/ society so on).

I will flatly disagree with this theory in its literal sense. Lets take a good life today, a family with wife/hubby and children, a good income, a posh house, great friends without comparison and no rat race to prove self worth. Its happiness all the way, but life will never have it so simple. There will be problems. And problems do not get dealt with without emotion and emotions bring with it unrest in the mind, fear and misery. Therefore is the recital of "Om namo Narayana" good enough to rid one self off that misery.

Ramanuja said this to those people who were illiterate and yes, you and I are largely illiterate in the field of spiritualism today.

These are some of Ramanuja's teachings:

1) You can follow spiritualism while following a life within the social network of your family and society.

My argument: Yes! With nagging parents talking investment in property, a spouse contemplating a brand new swanky car, a crying child going spoilt with added peer pressure, a servant mopping the house with her share of constant jabber, a cribbing sibling with clashing egos (am not referring to guns yet!), and not to forget your noisy neighbor playing Led Zeppelin (old fashioned?) right through Sunday morning while you are trying to concentrate on worship - "Om Namo Narayana" - Wow what peace! This is ignoring the calls to Allah, or Halleluja, or "Kaushalya supraja" blaring through loudspeakers at 5a.m. There is nothing wrong in recital of the mantra; there is every thing wrong with your environment. Where is the peace? Parents, spouse, children… When is this entire saga going to end, where is the silence and tranquility. Is this the life you chose for yourself or have you accepted that there is no escape. Or are there other ways of leading life, this being the most common and safe approach?

2) The second teaching is, after you have done your duty as householders you can retire to the forest and go into seclusion, but can always come to see the family. For e.g. meet your grand daughter on the day of her wedding or see her off to the US. Meaning you don’t entirely cut off from the family. But when you are involved in worship keep the family out of your mind.

My argument: How does this work. If my grand daughter is unwell, where will my mind be? Human bondage brings worry with it as much as it brings happiness. Both add to suffering from two ends of the same spectrum called Maya. If I continue to remain attached to the family I can quite forget my trip to realization for its completely impossible. Human bondage is a vicious cycle that one cannot get out of easily but has to put in complete effort to want to do so. Multi tasking of role-play and finding the self is completely impossible given our minds don’t even rest in one place in today's world.

3) The third teaching says that reciting "Om Namo Narayana" is all that it takes to attain salvation.

My argument: Maybe then, not now. If spiritualism was that simple we would all be saints by now, which of course as we can see is not the case. Happiness starts with the self. To exuberate happiness and goodness to all, the concentration should first be on the self. If I am not happy there is no way I am going to make you feel happy. Hence comfort with the self is far more important before one decides to look beyond his/herself.

My personal opinion on the teachings of Shankaracharya and Ramanuja is that both these saints were right in their approach, but with a difference. We need both approaches to be worldly wise and understand life and live through it. The philosophy of dvaita is required to understand the meaning of bondage, its character and hence its futility since it is Maya and only sucks you into its "Matrix". But it is needed nonetheless for the lack of that knowledge renders you completely ignorant for you will not understand peace if you don’t know what trouble is!

The philosophy of Advaita is needed to be brought in for it renders you compassionate and once all bondage is broken, the mind is set free, there is no pain nor love but pure goodness that flows from within to all creatures, to man, woman, mother, child, ant, cat or cockroach. There is no difference between the person in front of you defined by role-play as "mom/dad" or "daughter/son" or "wife/husband" or "stranger/thief" or "pet dog/cat Tommy”. Each is a life around you and detachment only leads to looking at all of them as one drop of a larger ocean of which you are also a part. Hence finding yourself is most important for the truth you look for lies within.

Love of the Lord brings with it Bhakti which helps along the path of emotional spirituality while you apply human logic while living through life. Love can be for Lord Shiva (who helps you search for yourself) or Lord Vishnu (who helps you understand the world around you). The Mother Goddess...is for stronger willed people, for more potent experiences that might burn you out if you are not careful.

Great teachers have helped us re-look at our lives. Maybe its time now for us to unlearn...

The temple of the Self

A beat of the drum
A tap of my feet
A move of my limbs
A strange freedom of the senses

A constant vibration
Deep within the heart
A new world revealed
A gateway to leave human bondage

A stretch of my breath
A long stretch so fulfilling
Purity of the self
Fresh like the morning dew

Constant warmth within
A flame lit up forever
Igniting my passion to live
A life of my own

A source of energy
My elixir of life
My potent energy within
The Lord takes control of me

I am just a moving body
A world elsewhere
A place no one else belongs
A world divine

My body a temple
To worship
Built strong to house
The divine Lord within

My head the pinnacle
Of all thought and action
Of goodness and value
Of faith and complete surrender

The path to heaven
A path through me
A part to the greater truth
Why seek for it beyond me?

Definition of goodness in the Mahabharata

The Mahabharata: In the Mahabharata Kunti is considered the epitome of all goodness, an honorable and respectable queen mother to her children the Pancha Pandavas. Yet we fail to see the fact that she is responsible for the birth of her first son Karna, and the pressures of having come from a royal background does not allow her to acknowledge him as her son. How good a mother was she?

She didn’t bring him up, she denied him his experience of having a mother, and to top it all she asked him to use his “Divyastra” just once, hoping that it would miss Arjuna and therefore not take his life. Is discrimination towards children right to the point of taking a life? How do we expect to see Kunti as a good mother through Karna’s eye and yet he held no grudge against her.

Karna is known to be a very noble person in the Mahabharata, and everyone except Dhuryodhana, the so-called most evil person in the story, wronged him. Karna was a great human being and the one and only known threat to Arjuna when it came to archery or when it came to winning the hand of Draupadi. The insult bestowed upon him by Draupadi was one he would never forget. Was it right on her part to publicly insult Karna in a court with full audience during her Swayamwara, on the grounds of his birth? How do we expect to see Draupadi as a noble woman through Karna’s eye?

Now lets take Dhuryodhana, the proclaimed villain in the Mahabharata. He had to fight for the throne since it was not even his fault that his father was a blind king and that questioned his eligibility to the throne. Would you in his position not take objection if such power were denied to you, should you have been the possible heir to the throne of Hasthinapura? Of course you would hate your cousins no matter how noble they were.

In all this chaos, the Pandavas have been the worst sadists when it came to Karna, for they kept referring to his caste, as a charioteer’s son, and that he is not of noble blood. Are Yudhishtira and Arjuna the epitomes of Dharma, when their noble birth only fills them with contempt and fear towards Karna because he is just as good despite being born in a lower caste? (Of course they didn’t know he was their brother but putting down someone on the grounds of birth is just a clear indicator of what pride they had!) And at this moment Dhuryodhana was a good man to make Karna his friend, to acknowledge his presence and respect him as a man of valor. Then why do we consider Dhuryodhana an evil being? There was goodness in him and at no cost was it going to display itself towards the Pandavas. Through all these insults that Karna had to live through, Kunti maintains absolute silence.

Therefore how do we judge goodness? Do we say Karna was wrong because he joined the Kauravas because at that moment between Yudhistira (the epitome of goodness and Dharma) and Dhuryodhana (the most evil), it was Dhuryodhana who stretched out a friendly hand? Now is that not goodness, irrespective of Karna's background?

Or do we say Krishna was good when all the political manipulation took place thanks to his ardent bias towards the Pandavas. He didn’t do things as a mark of goodness; he did politically correct things, which need not be defined as good. And what did Karna do to deserve the fate he finally got! Maybe it is seriously time to start thinking. Karna was the best son of them all!

Disowned by his own mother
Insulted by his own brothers
Respected by so called villains
Wronged by the Lord Himself
A good-natured man sees such fate
When the Lord himself chose not to protect him
Who will believe in Goodness?
When goodness itself is being ignored.
By the very Incarnation of Lord
Who tried to spread goodness in this world.
Karna was indeed the most noble of them all
Such was the ocean of goodness within him
That he gifted it away to the world before he died.
A symbol of perfection
That beats the very Lord Krishna Himself.

A finger for the future, an angula for the past

I held up my hands in prayer to God this morning and as I opened them I stared into them and my palm and wondered about the power they held. My fingers smeared and shining yellow with turmeric powder, reminded me about the life I have chosen to lead. A life of orthodoxy, one of purity as prescribed in the shastras, one that states that purity of the body is very important apart from that of the mind.

It was a moment of bliss, a decision I had made to follow this path. As I stepped into it deeper, I came to realize the meaning of all that has been told to us as kids. Today I have slowly begun to realize the reason for this lifestyle and more than anything else I have learnt to appreciate every moment of it. I stared up at the portrait of the Lord, smiling down, enigmatic and yet calm. He seemed to speak a million truths, both big and small through the flame of the oil lamp as it flickered in front of me.

It is a small wick, a bright flame, eating into the wick, sucking out the oil as it lives through the worship. A potent flame that needs the oil to survive, I remembered what my Guru had said. The flame is important, for it is the path that connects you with the Supreme, hence the size of the flame should definitely not exceed the division of the angula (finger) on my hand. The flame shows me the path, the character of which is defined by the height of one division on my index finger. One division, a whole world undiscovered, one finger engulfs a complete world of serious mathematics.

I turned my hands to see a series of lines that define my character, my identity in this universe. These almost looked like they were my blueprints in this world, in this space that we call reality. I thought about the importance of these fingers of mine, that each finger held a truth, a truth that leads man to paradise, undefined by modern science, lets say unknown to modern science.

A finger or an angula has been a basic system of measurement in olden times. One angula clearly defined the base, the root to an entire temple construction. It’s amazing that we could probably find out the size of Rajaraja Chola’s finger based on the basic system of measurement he would have used to build something as superb and mammoth as the Brihasdeshwara temple at Tanjore.

Imagine a ritual, to prepare the ground for the building of this magnificent temple, a ritual that defines the man building it is Rajaraja Chola, of a particular Gotram, a particular naksharam, in a particular yuga, on say Somavara (day), in a particular month, in a particular year, considered auspicious, as the ruling king of the Cholas in the south of Bharat desha, so on and so forth… in a series of mystical words that enter the ears of the devas and super Gods who now have placed him and have accepted his offering of building a temple on this earth, the soil of which is so pure and powerful.

And then the yajna fire rises, and the offerings of ghee, herbal twigs, fruits, flower, camphor, honey and jaggery are made to complete this grand start. Now the funds roll out, the construction begins and as every new pinnacle on this gigantic pyramidal roof is reached a huge ramp is built to move the final cover stone (stupi) up the tall vimana. Such an imposing structure, so massive and awe inspiring, that it reduces our presence to nothing. Would anyone even stop to think that the basic measure started with his angula or index finger!!! A small measure, imprinting Rajaraja Chola’s very being into every stone that was cut and put into place, inscriptions that spoke of his greatness somewhere hid the fact that yes, he had left his blueprints here long after he was gone…

Now that is Immortality...all bundled into a finger... this is leaving a legacy behind.

Home is where the soul belongs

Home! Home means different things to different people. Home means family to some and complete intrigue to others. I have a home, what I call family, familiarity, security… home, that which we all cling to. Home, a place where a bunch of scared souls live, saving each other from the final reality…when its seriously time to depart…

Home, is where the heart is! Home is where there is excitement unknown, when the heart yells out and says, this is a free world and I can do what I want and not care about it… My heart is free, my mind is free, and my life is free. I am free. Free from all that I call bondage, expectation, contempt, control, power… life?
Home is where the mind decides it has had enough; where the mind decides it wants to rest because it can’t handle anymore of the stupidity this world around displays thinking it is attitude. The mind rests, evolving suddenly, waking up to the reality called LIFE, and that is the only one I get and what the hell am I doing wasting it with a bunch of nonsensical thoughts!!

Home is where silence resides, in the deep corners of the mind, revived every time the mind takes a dip into life as it is and escapes from all that we call responsibility and role play… Home, where its my world, the world I make for myself and anyone who loves and appreciates the value of this life and its true meaning is invited…

Home is where the Lord lives, silent watching and waiting for me to go back to. Home where the Lord, just overwhelms me with Himself, and I simply get distracted and looked around for Him in people… what a fool I have been. The Lord is ever so pervasive, ever so kind and loving, ever so sweet, ever so overwhelming that words are not enough to express His beauty. Wow! what a character, what a feeling… that the Lord can trigger this ecstasy, this bliss, this intoxication, this wildness, this fire, this energy, this excitement, this happiness, this awakening, this life inside me without even revealing Himself!

What are we wasting our lives for, taking care of each other when we are all going to go home alone, anyway… why is it so tough to accept this truth that your way and mine are the same back home, just timed differently…
It’s a dark forest, of fear and suffocation… but it’s the way home, the last walk home, with peace and faith that Lord Shiva is there to guide, divine Lord.. Oh God take me home!!

Infact in the current state i am in its just ... HHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMM.... i think you get the drift!

An Ode to Mangalam Pati

Srirangam Tamil Nadu, time unknown:

Mangalam Pati is an orthodox lady I heard, oval faced, lean, always in a 9 yards saree and wearing gold frame spectacles. She has sharp eyes, is disciplined and is everything an orthodox tyranical pati should be. She wears a small gold chain around herself and a larger beaded gold rudraksha around her neck. She rules the family, her laws are orthodox but not to everyone, its only to the deserving. For mangalam pati teaches only the deserving, the essential meaning of life. Learning is a tough game, with a million "thopakarnams" thrown in along with innumerable "kuttus" should you make a mistake, but its only now when we are old that we realize how much that training helped.

An old pati in an age old agraharam. Mangalam pati does not come downstairs at all. She doesnt talk to all, well not to anyone at the first meet. When one goes to meet her, they wash their hands and feet and preferable have a shining jadagam against their name. Mangalam pati loves jadagams.

She has a soft corner for one of her grandsons, and what a soft corner it was. He was made to learn the laws of orthodoxy, the laws of karma, the laws in the dharma shastra, the laws of the agamas...lets say the laws of good living in short, of course with his fair share of "thopakarnams" and "kuttus". Mangalam pati taught him to face the world, the world of karma, giving lessons on defence strategies of parigarams. Mangalam pati taught all she knew to the grandson she loved the most.

It was another silent evening, the sun had just set. Mangalam pati lit the oil lamp and sat silently in her room. A sacred room I would say. The children ran around the house proclaiming to all not to go upstairs for Mangalam pati was talking to Lord Ganesha! No one dared to disturb her, except her most favourite grandson. He took the guts to walk up to her room.

In the silent room sat Mangalam pati, the oil lamp light glittering in her gold spectacle frame. Not a sound, not a movement in the air. Her rudraksha gently formed a stream of gold to the floor.

And on the floor lay a yellow line ever growing.

A simple sight, a profound moment. Witnessed by her only favourite grandchild. Never again questioned and hushed away, the yellow line had more than a line to say.

Grantham, the ancient language of the Gods has strange ways of sending the message across. In a matter of hours the day was gone, the world moved on and Mangalam pati sat silent, enlightened. What a life! Mangalam pati was indeed a very dynamic woman.

One fine day, her grandson went for his dance performance. He insisted she come to see it and in a gentle voice she said "You go ahead, I will come". That was the last he saw of her. Mangalam pati died that night, but she had done well for herself. The Lord took her with Him, to his Abode, Kailasa.

I sat listening to this story on Mangalam Pati, I believed I had never met Mangalam pati and yet I knew her so well. Mangalam pati was my only connect, to the strange new world I live in now. Strange it is, blessed I am, to have once been her grandchild.

Mangalam pati, mangalam mangalam.

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Terms: (Gio, this is for you!)

Pati - grandmother,
Kuttu - a knock on the head when you dont do something right. Hurts most often.
Thopakarnam - to hold ones ears and descend to the floor, squat and rise all the way up. Typically based on a count, which gets tougher as the count increases. It is a punishment to children when they do not listen, still practised in old indian households.

Its my heart - the Abode of the Lord

A place in my heart
Just for the Lord
To dance his way through
Its inner chambers

It’s a wild heart
Crazy in love
Just that the lord
Knows where to hide

It’s a gentle heart,
He moves touching its walls
Every now and then
Sensitive to my soul.

A big heart,
To hold his magnanimity
All his glory
Within one small self

Who said greatness was big
It’s all in here
One small heart
Only for the Lord who lives within

A heart that beats
A rhythm to his feet
He dances
Igniting my soul every moment

A heart carefree
Open forever
Lets Him go wherever he wishes
He never leaves

A heart so pure
Clear and fresh
It’s his breath
I feel the chill every day

A heart so wild
It plays with me,
A cosmic conspiracy
Right here within my being.

A precious heart
Just for him
The Lord dances wild
Crushing my ignorance.

A strong heart
Holds His truth
A form I do not know
A form potent within

It’s a warm heart
Houses Him
As he dances and moves
Complete in his fiery self.

It’s a heart that aches
Aches to see the Lord
Finally he would reveal
His truth some day.

It’s a heart
That yarns for Him
When he hides away
Deep within my being.

Its my heart
Like a thousand petal lotus
Cradles the lord
A part of me forever

Kailasa - The Abode of Lord Shiva

A high mountain
Cold winds blow
A forbidden world
Silent, constant forever

A majestic mountain
Kissed by a thin cloud
That ambitiously climbs
To meet its peak

An imposing mountain
That echoes silent reverberation
Within itself
One single syllable, complete.

A mountain
Untouched and clean
Far from human madness
Pure and hidden away

A mountain that gives life
As the rainbow drapes it
In it’s many colors
Pure energy, pure nature, pure love

A mountain so silent
The abode of the Lord
A complete world of mine
Simple paradise

A mountain I behold
With my inner eye
My home, with the Lord
Beautiful home of mine

A dance into Lord Nataraja's heart

Kapaleeshwarar temple, Mylapore Chennai: This is a strange happiness I felt when I went to the temple last Saturday morning. I had my ipod plugged into my ears and had Ray Charles playing while I walked through the Kapaleeshwarar koil in Mylapore Chennai.

You know, much as it sounds incongruous, to listen to blues and stare at the Lord within the walls of the garbha griha, it’s quite an experience in itself.

It is a strange combination, to stare at the Lord in all His alankaram, far within those deep walls almost wet with the humidity around. The whole floor is mine, the music in my ears, the rhythm in my feet, the excitement in my heart and suddenly all the ganas appear in a wild line playing across the ceiling. The flames dance around the dark walls, the rock creating the ambience of complete high with the smoke rising within the chamber, highlighting the ganas as they strangely begin to move with the beat within my heart. Dim lighting, and I follow the line of ganas in rhythmic movement, a dance of intoxication, a dance of freedom, a dance with no inhibitions, a dance of love, a dance of complete consciousness, a dance where only the Lord and I exist.

The drums reverberate, the beat charging my heart, the music relaxing the grey cells... there is no room for thought. It’s the moment of living, the moment without worry, the moment of bliss, the moment of no bondage, the moment when the heart is in perfect beat with the feet, the whole body has a single rhythm running within itself. And there He stands, in all His finery, Lord Nataraja Himself. An the music mounts, and the heavens open and begin to sing along, the Lord descends from his seat, holds me and leads the way, the whole hall lights up and the Gods shower down flowers into the hall, now beaming with fire torches across the walls.

The Lord dances with me, a dance of love, gentle steps, the moon glowing among his locks, his warm eyes, the snake sways along, a ribbon of moonlight, as he dances to the ever growing rhythm in my heart. I merge into him, with the Lord himself, such love, such warmth, such happiness, such beauty, such a sea of calm… silence, peace.

A glorious welcome into the family of the Lord, into the world of Kailasa, the whole hall now dances in perfect unison, everyone onto the floor. It’s a welcome into the kingdom of heaven! Its love love, love, crazy love! A whole new world, dancing with Lord Shiva down the hall, the music all around me, as Lord Nataraja leads the way, the ganas follow behind us…A dance into life, a different life, free, no hang ups, no hard feelings, just pure love. Truly is the kingdom of love, love, love crazy love!

Thank you Ray Charles… Thank you God! What a place, what a song!

27 steps around Nandikeshwara

It's been an interesting week at Thiruvannamalai, it always has something new to offer on a platter. I would believe getting personalized attention towards enhancing my spiritual thirst has brought me a long way. It was on my janma nakshatram that I was advised to do the 27 rounds of circum-ambulation around Nandi, and finally whisper my wish into His ear.

27 rounds around Nandi was a small walk through my life. Nandi sat in silent meditation, dhyanam - a state of eternal bliss. A state I wonder whether I would ever achieve. It woud be such intoxication to sit permanently in front of the Lord, facing him, a constant conversation in silence with no disturbance from the outside world. Nandi, silent in Dhyanam was probably unaware that I made silent rounds around Him wishing every minute I was in His place.

27 rounds, flashed my life around me, as I watched myself walk around the temple alone, in the darkness looking at ancient walls, whisper into my ears that there is a lot more within those walls and I have just about started to scratch the surface. Each step forward, felt like I was leaving the world of misery behind. Each breath, fresh and pure into a realm untouched.

27 rounds that were watched by sadhus around the temple wondering who I was and what I was doing. A slight disbelief that a woman clad in jeans and t-shirt can be "religious". A slight curiosity that looks might be deceptive, that we might lead strange lives and appear western in attire but are pretty much traditional at heart.

27 rounds around an ancient temple that has been renovated a million times over and now disfigured bearing no resemblance to its original self. Yet a silent aura around it brings back the rhythm of drums in my ears and makes my feet dance to its tunes. It was a dark evening, no moon, but enough light to give a feel of the hill towering behind me, protecting me from all known dangers.

27 rounds, each round like worship to the 27 forms of the Lord, of which I have just begun to discover Him slowly, one form after the other. Pleasant forms, fierce forms, meditative and enigmatic, all rolled into One. Lord Shiva - gentle, caring, warm, forever protecting and calm. Silence drapes the walls of the temple, each tassel laced by moths and spider webs, permanent residents of this small heavenly abode. How I wish I could have remained here for ever.

Finally I stood in front of Nandi, holding up my hands on his horns, and looking at the divine form of the Lord through the window of his heart as I placed my other hand above His tail. Oh Nandi, I wish to be as lucky as you some day. To stare at the Lord forever, in complete dhyanam, complete conciousness.

The dance of enlightenment

The sound of the damaru
A new life is born
A new rhythm set in divine motion
The dance of life
The dance of procreation
It is the churning of the ocean of life.
The Lord meditates, the world is stable
All is bright and peaceful
He brings in calm and warmth
Crushes the head of ignorance
Performing the dance of enlightenment
He is complete with charge
And with those thunderous steps
He sways in wild motion
Destroying all darkness
The flames of enlightenment
Form rings of light
Such radience, such dynamism, such grace
Oh what a sight to behold
These very flames burn all ignorance
And raise one to ever lasting bliss
There is silence on His face
A vision of another world
In the glow of the crescent moon
Cradled around gentle locks, the jatas
Oh burn me in the flames of enlightenment
Take me to that new beginning
Like a new born, innocent and beautiful.
Like a child in Your arms forever.

The flames of Shiva Lingodhbhava

I have reached the gates of heaven
It was a tough slow walk up
On hard pebbled pathway
laiden with still air and burning hot

Tiresome is the walk of life
A walk you have to make
To see the path to heaven
I am truely blessed with this grace.

As I approach the gardens of life
I feel the peace descend
I hear the music in the air
I feel the chill on my being

A small house cradled in green
Not a soul, just complete silence
A small river flows within
the deep crevasses of the mountain

They call it the mountain of fire
And yet there is water within
Life giving water when you hear its sound
Soul bearing strength when you drink it.

A small house in the mountains
A small shrine within its deep walls
A small lamp lights up the whole chamber
A small flame it lights in my heart.

My eyes close, my thoughts fade
As I feel the warmth of the flame
My soul searches for that lost land
Deep within my being.

I have been so lost, I have never known
The purpose of my existance
My heart sinks with sorrow
Pity over my lost self

My body still, my thoughts gone
my breath slow, my vision in haze
I stare at the wick, as it burns in flames
In a silent sea of light it displays

A sea so still, a mirror to me
So crystal clear, so new to feel
The oil holds up a vision to me
Within it a silent dancing flame.
A reflection so clear, so overwhelming
As the wick gives way to the Lord
He stands within His stony self
As the fire glows around him.

A throne of wick around a wall of fire
O Lingodhbhava, Thy great form
As endless heat and flames rise
Showing me the path to infinity

A boar digs deep so futile
A swan flies high in vanity
The boar pardoned in the warm flames of love
The swan burnt in the flames of pride.

The Lord stands in all Magesty
As the wall of flames cradles Him
Its rhythmic sway around the wick
As He feeds them with everlasting love

A vision so real, a feeling so wild
As I continue my walk of life
The world has realized my fiery side
They say they see it in my eyes.

*****************************************

Based on the mythology of Shiva Lingodhbhava(where Shiva appears within a mountain of fire that rises out of the sea and breaks the war between Brahma and Vishnu challenging them to find the ends of His infinite flaming Linga.) this coupled with a trip to Skandashram Thiruvannamalai.

Bhojeshwar Mandir, host of the largest Ancient Shiva Linga.

Bhojpur Madhya Pradesh:
There was this little kingdom ruled by Raja Bhoj in the 10th cen AD, who had very ambitious plans for his kingdom. Ambitious would be an understatement, for when we go visiting the now present Bhoj it gives us a glimpse of this great vision.

Locked into itself within a natural fort of hills with a little river flowing by is the land of Bhoj. Residing within the lap of a lush green untouched landscape among rocky cliffs and watered by a clear river flowing by, is this ancient little town that once boasted of great wealth. Its a slow life into paradise, where low boats ferry you down the river to the great dam built centuries ago. Big bolders of rock capture the water as it flows through bringing refreshing water to the land of Bhoj. The air is heavy with silence peace and tranquility, an atmosphere so absent in our current lives.

And right in the midst of this sea of green, in everlasting silence, stands a single chamber large and hollow with fresh cool air. It doesnt boast of elaborate craftsmanship, it doesnt boast of a kingdom once alive, it just brings back a towering concept that looms around in the mind as one walks up towards the huge structure - Bhojeshwar temple.

Sheer rock, heavy and large, piled up one over the other make up the main structure of this one chamber that needs no explanation. The darkness within, revealing towering pillars holding up the roof allowing partial light into the chamber. A hint of scupture gives an idea of what magneficence there would have been in the minds of those who planned this temple.

A silent magestic shiva linga once worshipped, now displays itself within this stark interior. No lamps, no flowers, just spotlit within its hollow interior. The sun's flames, the only light, the rain, the only water that bathes this linga, the wind, the only carrier of fragrance of flowers when all else is forgotten. The Lord stands there silent, an imposing self, still shining bright against polished stone.
Imagine a tune being hummed within these walls, as the air carries the notes and the sound echoes within the chamber, ringing in your ears. You wake up to that underlying rhythm of drums as the Lord dances in the heart of anyone who beholds him in his silent abode.

A temple half built, a vision half finished, a ramp half used, a roof half closed, a wall half built, a prayer that rings within its interiors, but a thought complete, an emotion felt.

Stone by stone, a temple in shape, put together with gigantic walls and pillars. What do we remove and what do we keep, what do we finish and what do we renovate. This temple stands all silent on a rocky ground holding up bolders of rock that once belonged to Raja bhoj. A deep breath in the silence, a thougth so crystal clear, a temple so imposing, even when its half finished... Such was the vision of Raja bhoj.

Please click on the pictures to see the enlarged view.
Photo courtesy: http://photos1.blogger.com http://www.shunya.net/

Offerings to Lord Shiva.

The realm of Vishvakarma
revealed to man a world of secrecy
brought down in stone.
Sinking the energy into the rock
from a world deep within my being.

I step towards it
gate by gate
cross each entrance with a heavy heart,
there is devotion, ther is fear
to truely realize what lies within.

As I enter, He cuts out the light
Images smile down from the walls
the Lord appears in various forms
to guide me through the darkness.

A step at a time a coconut in hand
I carry myself, my being with flowers
I am an offering I make to the Lord
to be one with Him in complete conciousness

The air is still, there is not a soul
the lamp lights dont flicker the walls are bare,
the world is silent
and the sacred hymns reverberate

there is fragrance in the air
there is warmth in the room
the Lord resides silent and still
the flames reveal the formless in stone
drawing me closer to Himself

My body behind, my soul in hand
the priest raises me into the air
he pulls off my ego
my curtain of illusion
and in a rhythmic flow of prayer reveals
to my third eye
the energy deep within.

The air stirs in vigor
as I dash to the floor
my ignorance broken,
my being revealed
the juice of potent energy flows out
to merge with the Lord

I do not exist in my body
I left that far behind
there is no breath, there is no thirst
there is no hunger, I know not fear
the priest raises the fire

My path to heaven
The Lord awaits at the door
to hold my hand
and lead me into a constant world
of complete conciousness.

***************************************
P.S. An offering of coconut and flowers is always made to the Lord at the main shrine. This is a possible significance.

Shore temple - a never ending saga.

When there is a convergence of two sciences, a truth is revealed.
When there is a merger of two resonating sounds the reverberation is felt.
When there is a culmination of thoughts between two minds a realization engulfs you.

Shore temple Mahabalipuram: Such was the state when i revisited Mahabalipuram yesterday. There was knowledge in the air, realization in the mind and excitement in the heart! I have visited Mahabalipuram too many times, and i have most often been the guide, telling people what to look for.

This time I went with my Guru since he had not visited the place. I thought i was an expert when it came to the Art History of Mahabalipuram. Strangely this time i maintained silence. There was this long moment of truth when two siences met, when i spoke on the basis of temple architecture and iconography and my Guru spoke on the basis of ritual. Ritual covers all the loop holes that art history misses out. This was clearly evident during our visit.

Art history helps to locate artifacts, and sculptures and gives the logical approach, ritual helps to explain them through subtle reality. This time the Shore temple had added a lot more meaning to my quest. It felt more like the jigsaw puzzle of truth was hidden all around it and prominently exhibited itself at the same time to all those who cared to take a deeper look.

Now let me explain. When you visit the Shore temple or any other old temple for the first time, the thrill has just begun. The first stage is of discovery. A visual display to the imagination you held about that place is now guided by the experience.

The subsequent few visits, display the most prominent facts to you, in the case of the Shore temple it would be two temples, assimetrically placed. Life size Nandis around the main wall and yalis along the walls of the temple. The temple has a platform, on which is the bhiti(wall), with niches and capitals with statues within them. A shrine chamber(garbha griha), with a path of circumambulation and maybe a vestible(antarala in larger temples). A strange reclining Vishnu on Ananta is sandwiched between the two Shiva shrines.

If the intrigue has lasted long enough and has made you look into books to look for what all this is about, then slowly more is visible. Built around 6th to 7th century AD, under the Pallavas, it was patronized by Narasimhavarman and Mahendravarman. The temple still follows the canons of architecture very strictly. It reveals a three tired roof and a five tired roof with strange architectural elements. Small heads called Kudu(tamil term, not sanskrit) figures lace the kapota (the base on which the roof stands). At this point all eyes are on the walls, which are profusely sculpted and the Vimana(roof) which is imposing and magneficent. You will realistically spend the next three years wondering about all the sculptures, their names, who they are and what are the stories behind them. You will find forms of Shiva you never heard of.

Lets assume you got the right books and stuck to them. The Pallavas were initially vaishnavite followers and later turned to Shaivism. Hence the sandwiched Vishnu is carved onto the bedrock and existed well before the temple took shape. Soon the attention shifts to the dwarapalas who are resting their body weight on the walls. Lions and elephants hold up the temple on thier backs and ganas are found every where. The linga is a three part stone of which the third part is embedded within the yoni and cannot be seen. What remains here is the depression in the floor. The panel inside the Garbha griha is Somaskanda panel. Mahishasuramardhini is found carved into the heart of a Lion on the side of the temple.

Conclusions: tolerance to different faiths, enough to leave two deities within the temple complex even if that was not precribed in the canons. Acceptance of the mother goddess cult as another equally potent cult by all faiths( that believed in male deities). Lesser gods like gandharvas and nagas suddenly appear on the walls and how did you miss them all along when they were so prominent!!

Then comes the next enlightenment! You just read about the Chalukyas who were contemporary to the Pallavas and therefore there is a sharing of ideas. The plinth is in chalukyan style and so is the science of carving dwarapalas though the style is pallava. How do we know that? One name strikes out of chalukyan guilds that coexisted with pallavas. Baladeva was a well known sculptor who specialized in carving dwarapalas and autographed his sculptures in pattadakkal. The same style is visible here.

Conclusion: an exchange of ideas and technique between the art worlds though there was war between Pulakesi(Chalukyas) and Mahendravarman(Pallava).

If this was not enough, well you have just about scratched the surface. You start looking at the ground plan, and the evolution of the temple. Judging by all the elements of architecture and going back into ancient architecture, the truth hits you that this was originally Buddhist architecture. The same elements take a functional position in Buddhist monastried in Ajanta and Bedsa. Meanwhile you might learn about the true nature of the Shiva Linga as being a part of Phallic worship and that you are actually worshipping the miracle of Procreation, no not the grose act but the subtle reality that governes it. Now the SomaSkanda panel suddenly makes more sense.

So now there is more to it, Phallic worship was a tradition as old as the Indus valley and there rose several subsects of Shaivism like Ligayats, tantriks and Pashupatas among others who had subtle differences in their rituals. The mother goddess cannot be eliminated and her form can be seen as Parvati, durga and Kali. It is also interesting that Somaskanda is another name for Muruga. And yes, Muruga was originally a dravidian war God before he got christened into the Shiva pantheon while Ganesha is a demi God who has now been elevated to God status with popular belief. None of them were born from the union of Shiva and Parvati.

There are many parallel thoughts running in your mind by now. One would be the connection of the Shiva Parvati icons with the philosophy of Kundalini yoga depicted through the Somaskanda panel. The meaning of life as we see it through the Mahishasuramardhini panel. The undying presence of Shiva and Parvati whose origins cannot be dated. And finally the presence of copulation scenes on some temple walls. Why is sex depicted too blatantly when our mindsets are against nudity.

It takes a long while for this one, the hidden presence of yantras all over the place which has ever so remained a secret. That the scenes on the Khajuraho temples were to hide this truth so that we, the uninitiated never get to see what is behind them(works brilliantly). The presence of a mandala that is at the ground plan of the temple. The presence of forms of Lord Shiva selectively places in various niches.

Every thing had a reason... and then my Guru spoke.

Temple characterestics and iconography for Indian deities.

The backbone of temple architecture is the presence of Guilds across various kingdoms in India. Their orders come from the royal architects and funds come in from the ruling patronage. Architecture and sculpture sustained their expression on temple stone walls and pillars by the Guilds. Kings didn't define the kind of temples to be built but patronized them, but the Guilds gave the temples and monasteries their form and structure by following the canon's of architecture laid down by the ancients, with respect to their faiths.

Therefore if a King wanted a shaivite, vaishnavite, devi, buddhist, or Jain shrine, they just had to give the orders for it, the rest was taken care of by the Guilds. Hence the characteristic features of each of these temples would be as follows:

Shiva temple (before the Cholas):

• The deities to look for in a Shiva temple would be, the Shiva linga stone within the Garbha griha, which is strictly the aniconic symbol. Shiva in human form is never found within the garbha griha.
• The wall behind the Garbha griha will always have the Lingodhbhavamurti (depicting Shiva's supremacy over Vishnu and Brahma).
• The Vahana is Nandi
  
• The south wall will always have devi/ Mahishasuramardhini. She was later replaced by Parvati.
• The north wall depicts either Ganesha and Karthikeya or other forms of shiva like Dakshnamurti, Trimurti or Harihara(this order changes from temple to temple). Older temples depict only Shiva on all walls. The devi in the form of Parvati is depicted standing with him (Kalyanasundaramurti) or ardhanarishwara, else she is depicted as Durga/Kali dancing with Nataraja.
• The others: Saptamatrika only in ancient temples, Bhringi on some walls but not in a niche, Chandikeshwara, Rudra, Ganesha, and Karthikeya in separate shrines if they are not on the niches of the main sanctum.
• If there are depictions of Vishnu and Brahma, they would be in praise of Shiva or in submission. The only exception with any reference to the Ramayana is Ravana Anugrahamurti where Ravana is depicted shaking mount Kailasa.
• Nayanars take their place on the precinct.
• 108 lingas are placed in a single location or around the main shrine.
  

Post the Chola period; Devi got a seperate equally large shrine next to Shiva and Vishnu shrines within the main temple. (eg: Brihadeshwara temple under Rajaraja Chola originally had only the shiva temple, the sub shrines were added later by Sembian mahadevi, a Chola queen and then later by Vijayanagar and Nayaka rulers.)

Vishnu temples:

• The dashavatara is found on all the exterior walls of a Vishnu temple, as well as on the pillars.
• Large depictions in older temples would include Trivikrama/Vamana, Narasimha, Vishnu seated on Ananta.
• Vishnu within the shrine chamber(garbha griha) is depicted lying on Ananta in the cosmic sea, else he is depicted standing in Samabhanga pose (standing straight backed with hand resting on mace).
• Vahana is Garuda
  
• Devi is often depicted with him in the Varaha form.
• Krishna is very rarely depicted, if at all as Krishna Govardhana and krishna stealing butter.
• Scenes of the Ramayana adorn the outer walls, but do not occupy the niches. Exception is for the Ravana Anugrahamurti where Ravana is depicted shaking mount Kailasa.
• Icons of Shankha and chakra can be seen around the temple.
• Garuda and nagas are often depicted, nagas specifically are in submission.
• Hanuman is sometimes depicted in Vishnu temples.
• Alvars are depicted on the temple walls and pillars.
  

Devi temples:

• Mostly depict various forms of the Devi, in soumya(soft) rupa and krodha(fierce) rupa.
• The central shrine is either Bhuvaneshwari (soumya rupa) or Durga/ Kali(fierce form)
• All devis in shrines mostly face south, be it from garbha griha, or in niches of shiva temples.
• Very prominent scenes in ancient temples would be the scene of decapitation where a devotee is seen chopping his own head and sacrificing his life to the Mother. (Orissa, Mamallapuram)
• Copulation scenes on the outside of temples, or alternatively Kanyas in seductive poses. (Konark and khajuraho)
• Very rare depictions of Shiva lingas, which is almost close to negligible.
• Vahana is a lion.
• Walls are adorned by worshippers, both royal and common folk.
  

Buddhist shrine - cave temples:

• Buddha depicted in certain mythological events like Miracle of Sravasti(buddha multiplies himself a 1000 times to beat his religious rivals including Mahavira), Parinirvana(Buddha in the state of Nirvana), Temptation of Mara(Buddha attacked by the three damsels and a whole demon army sent by Mara), Buddha begging alms from his wife. Most often depicted are Buddha giving a sermon or standing.
• Profusely painted on walls are the Jataka tales of Buddha's past incarnations.
• Padmapani and Maitreya come in later.
• There are no vahanas.
  
• Older Hinayana phase elements to look for are stupas, pair of slippers, pair of feet, and a bodhi tree with a pair of feet beneath it.
• Hariti and Panchika, where hariti has a child on her lap. She is the Goddess of smallpox, a child eating ogress whom Buddha converted into a protector. Panchika is her consort and also very well known as Kubera yaksha.

Jaina temples and caves:

• Jain tirtankaras and more tirtankaras.
• Gomateshwara and parshvanatha are a vew well known tirtankaras who can be seen in the Garbha Griha and on the walls of the cave temples.
• Sculptures are mostly nude.
  

Nagas are found everywhere, and so are river Goddesses, mithuna couples and gandharvas.

Shrines within Girivalam

Girivalam, in silence: On a full moon night Thiruvannamallai has a charm of its own. On one end it hosts a million pilgrims who walk the sacred path of Girivalam, and on the other nothing stirs in its silence. Every experience revolves round the sacred hill that hosts far more shrines than whats found scattered around the sacred road. We find all the Gods here, starting with Ganesha, leading the way to the Mother Goddess to Shiva Lingas scattered all over, popularly called the Ashta Dikapala Lingas. Krishna occupies a special seat near a temple tank along the road.

So what makes Girivalam so interesting! A walk down the paths that lead towards the hill off the main road, covered with trees and forests have more shrines than what we would imagine. One such mud road stands silent, with a lot of thorny bushes blocking the pathway with a forbidding picture a Kali at the entrance.The first though is that there could be a shrine for the Goddess further inside, maybe with a stone altar in front of it for animal sacrifice. But interestingly it is quite a different story. We decided to walk into the forests surrounding the hill and debated on what we would do should we encounter some wild animals or snakes in the early evening. Our heated discussion came to an abrupt end when we came upon a silent pond, bathed in traquility far away from all mankind right in the middle of nowhere!

A silent square pond with lots of fish and frogs, green with life with low branches of trees almost kissing its surface brimming with life... we could have almost taken a dive into its cool waters. The pond looked deep and clean as the sun's rays penetrated through the green canopy of leaves. Along the side were large stones with arrows pointing in a direction that indicated this was the ancient path of Girivalam around the main hill. This peaceful setting, the ancient path that disappeared into the forest, shielded from all the noise against the hill, also had a dilapidated house next door with a gaping hope to the side. As we explored the place, we found that the gaping hole led down a stairway to rooms under the earth right next to the pond. Too close i thought. Filled with rubble with the cieling almost falling in, we decided not to get too adventurous and came out of it hoping not to meet any lizards of snakes on the way out.

Once outside, this tranquil little place, spoke of an underground chamber right beneath our feet. We were just left to wonder what it could have been used for! Excited about the find but a little disappointed since we did not find any shrine for the Goddess, we walked back to civilization promising to come back here surely some day.

We drifted through the evening as we saw the full moon slowly climb up the sky from behind the great hill lighting up the whole forest again after the sunlight dimmed out. The night was silent with a cool breeze drifting through the trees. Clouds scattered around the sky drifted over the peak of the hill almost giving it a natural halo that revolved around it for a long while. It was a fantastic sight!

We walked to the Kannappa nayanar shrine embedded deep within the forest, our path now lit up brightly by the moonlight. Kannappa nayanar shrine stood silently ahead, with a stairway leading up to the small sanctum. We walked up slowly, after our conversation merged into the silence. None of us spoke, for what we experienced was true beauty and tranquility at its best.

We sat back on the stony floor, each to himself, bathed in the streaming moonlight, looking over the canopy of trees. The gentle breeze brushed over us leaving behind a cool comfort. The magestic hill stood behind, as my eyes rolled over from the floating clouds outside to the chamber within. A silent Kannappa Nayanar looked straight at me through the small shrine where a small oil lamp lit up his face and his silver plated eyes. It was simply awesome! Kannappa Nayanar stood there, reminding us of lost potency in spiritualism that once rules these lands.

Girivalam will live forever reminding us of every saint who made a mark in our history! Walking the same path is a choice we make.

Wonder of wonders, Miracle of miracles

Thiruvannamallai - 3 hours from Chennai.

Its a full moon night, Poornima, and the moon beams its gentle rays down on earth and lights up small spot lights along Girivalam, a narrow but sacred road that leads around the main hill. Its that time of the month, when couple of lakhs of people throng the temple and this otherwise peaceful road to attain salvation of some sort, or at least gain a few brownie points with the Lord. Dad decided to join the crowd, while I sat back with a friend of mine and watched the world go by, quite literally!!

I reflected on how I had even made it in there. I had no idea, cars were not allowed, I had no idea that Poornima calls for a lakh people walking across your feet all in one evening... and worse still, trying to get my way through an army of policemen. To make matters worse, the two way lane had been made a one way with police barricades and highway traffic had been diverted elsewhere. I closed my eyes, wishing against all hope to be allowed without question.

While driving down along Ramanamaharshi's ashram, I figured, that this was going to be hell, yet I tugged at the accelerator. One reaching the entrance of Girivalam, I was stopped by three inspectors, all of whom said there was no way four wheelers would be allowed, and that I should park my car on some way-side road and join the masses walking. I had to meet my Guru, the man who had trusted me and shown me the way, I had to meet him. That was the reason given, that I had no plans of walking and I wished to take the car through the wall of people. But no, there was no chance, until the inspector saw my father... "Your father is old, and its good to see that he wants to go around the hill. We dont allow anyone, but we shall let you through madam. "

It was funny, dad got down and started to walk, while the inspector told me to take a side lane and get onto Girivalam. And so I did it, dissolving every ounce of sympathy the inspector showed towards my "aged" father who is quite actually fit as a fiddle, far more than me! Driving down a wall of people with no aim but to cross the massive hill that stands near us, was not a joke. Little did I want to call attention onto myself by pressing the horn, I slowly moved with the crowd. It was the slowest my car had ever done! When I reached, my Guru was amazed - How did they let your car in? They dont let any car in, not even VIPs, not even CMs!

With my baby parked on the side, and a cup of tea in my hand, I stared on, at the oil lamps that lit the temples, at the rising flames of fire as people dropped in their camphor in front of the various shrines, at the very shrines now bright as ever with tube lights, killing every shred of serenity and awe that would lure anyone to strange promises of enlightenment from dark chambers within these temple walls. The road was alive, with people selling anything from "Venga Saandhu"(the black paste used to put a dot on small children to ward off evil spirits ), to huge posters of the new light called the Art of Living! There was just about every marketing gimmick that sold faith out for a few bucks... It was business time, and all the small shrines minted money with collections taking place, for temple maintenance and God knows what else.

I looked up to my Guru, why has the Girivalam Trust put a light inside the Garbha Griha? Isn't that wrong? This was the only shrine left, and they had destroyed that too.. I saw deep sorrow in his eyes, and helplessness, he was speechless. I knew what had happened. Greed for money had made them light up the interiors of these once powerful temples, so that people come and dish out more money at the various shrines, they didnt care for the shrines anymore.. it was all Money... What could my Guru have done, but live with these atrocities while his immense knowledge just stayed back in his mind.

We laughed over small things, simple things in life, on and off taking Simran's trip... she made amazing tea. Yes small things, simple things.. while we watched the seriously big things getting destroyed silently.

It was a different Girivalam I saw that night, one that posed a world of problems, one that showed the collective hope of a million people as they walked by, scarcely caring for the slow silent destruction of the very shrines they worshipped...

I left at 10.30 that night, promising to come back the next day, as I waded through the river of people, slowly, till I finally managed to get to the hotel, right next to the main temple gate. I walked into the reception to see a bewildered old man, the hotel manager who stood gaping, and all he could say was, "How did you get here, they dont allow cars through to the temple gate this evening, in the history of this place, yours has been the first car I know of that managed to come through!"

The Lord works in strange ways to make His presence felt!

A circle of Constants...

This is not about temples, but about the Self. Today, i went back to Google search, to refresh my decaying knowledge in Math and went through circles again. There was something about it, not about solving the toughest problems, not about the complexity it can take you into but that one simple thing that we call a Constant, often taken for granted but never explained. This time i chose to make a connect.

There is a constant in everything, including our lives, the concept of circles just being another such example of how varied their behavior is and yet there is a Constant that seems to give character to them.

Its very similar with us. The thirst for truth brings a variety of opportunities into our lives at various stages which need not be socially acceptable. There are many moments when people comes face to face with themselves wondering whether they should make that move towards the truth or continue in their routines. Its a choice you make based on the trust you have in yourself to look for this Truth or Constant, and the courage you have to disconnect with your familiar world.

Yes, the familiar world that you define as home, and all the people and components that go into its making. You might have made it yourself during the hunt for your Constant, that which largely is a subconcious search surfacing on and off while it remotely connects with events in your life. Those are your moments of absolute excitement, excitement you cannot explain but just emote. There is a Constant within you, not necessarily defined with a formula, or given a form(religion tries to do that for you). I grew to realize this in a warped sort of way.

My first definition of a Constant as i saw it was with family, but it brought in its own share of problems/ instability and didnt seem to follow the definition i had laid out for it either in reality or conceptually or in subtle reality. I realized somewhere that family was not where the Constant was, as it was more of an external element and not entirely my own. I moved my Constant away from people and home, realizing pretty fast that they were incapable of such position purely on the grounds of expectation and rule sets laid down by role play- family, marriage, etc.

Somewhere down the line it dawned on me that my work, which i possible considered as my Constant for a while, was not the right place either. I ended up getting into more of people management since actual performace was being taken as a given (Its like "We also make steel" - TISCO). I also realized that my Constant doesn't depend on whimsical people around me for my Constant is way too important to be tossed around.

So here I am, redefining my Constant to myself, its something that is purely mine, and does not call for outside interference, that is anyone beyond me. My Constant is that which stays with me and i derive my energy from it to define myself, to live, to understand, to perform, to survive and make myself concious of it every moment in the day. My Constant is not for me to share, but to help anyone look for their own. My Constant is formless, and i have chosen to define as Shiva, nothing more, nothing less. My Constant is visible in the Beauty of Lord Shiva, its defined in his dance, its felt in his fury, its awakened in his third eye.

A moment longer at Elephanta caves, Mumbai.

Elephanta caves, Mumbai: A moment longer at Elephanta caves can give a life time of happiness. Sounds strange, but when you discover the value of such an amazing monument, your mind rests on it forever. You know, these monuments scattered around our country side do not just stop with being tourist attractions but have greater value when we try to understand them a little more.

Art historians like George Michell, scanned the entire caves and brought out a book the beautifully represents Elephanta pictorially to the average reader. It has a few very interesting things about it that triggered my thoughts further on Elephanta, and it just blew my mind when i realized what i possibly found. I might be wrong, but i dont feel so.

Elephanta's main cave hosts a four doored chamber which contains an incomplete Shiva Linga. In front of it stands a hall of pillars rather unassuming to start with. I think the cave faces east and on the south wall is our very famous Trimurti. Is all this leading somewhere, maybe... Lets walk a step back, what is Elephanta caves all about?

Elephanta caves hosts a complete cave dedicated to Shiva, with 11 iconographic representations from his various mythologies, 11 out of 25 forms of Shiva have been depicted here. Ok, if you though Vishnu was 10 and Shiva was 1, let me correct this, Vishnu is 10 but Shiva is about 25 forms.
This does not end here, i do not know the reason for picking these particular sculptures, am yet to figure that out, but what i know is that, what George Michell tried to conclude in these caves was that the ground plan represented some sort of a mandala that looks like this.



The square on the left is the shrine chamber that hosts the Shiva linga within it. The point i am trying to make is that much as he hit the nail on the head and said it represented a ground plan, i think he got it wrong diagramatically. Why do i say this?

For this we need to move away from pure are history and architecture towards ritual. The worship of Lord Shiva brings in the use of mystical diagrams like yantras to perform fulfilling worship of the Lord. The most auspicious yantra that represents Lord Shiva looks like this.


Now, counting the number of squares within this yantra we come to 25 (5x5) squares. Superimpose this on the ground plan of the cave, but not diagonally. The floor of elephanta now represents a living yantra, each square marked by a pillar at the corners, with the shrine chamber at the first square of row three, meaning square 11. (i hope you got the square) I think this number 11 is coincidental and may not symbolically represent the number of Shiva scultpures inside these caves. What remains a mystery to me right now is whether there was a lot more to this ritualistically or was this purely a representation to carry the tradition forward.

Now this might look normal and matter of fact to you. Well it does not look normal or matter of fact to me. I have woken up to this after 2 years of breaking my head on it, and man! this enlightenment makes a difference to me and makes me want to value these sculptures more than just beautiful depictions on stone. This is a hint of the potency that evolves when architecture and ritual combine which our ancestors have left behind for us, to take note of and pursue ( i dont mean to preach).

The more we soak ourselves in it, the more we dig deeper, the clearer it gets, and we are brought face to face with this potency. I cant explain this.. but i can only say its worth all the study i did, its worth all the frustration i have been through, its worth all the belief and faith i bank on! There IS something here to be looked at, cherished and valued.

Chaunsath Yogini temple

Chaunsath Yogini temple, 10th century, near Bhuvaneshwar:

The goddess, lesser known throughout the world but one of the most potent deities here, has long intriguied me. Though i am still reasonably unclear about her many forms, i am aware that Kali has ten forms called the ten mahavidhyas, though i dont quite know how the 64 yoginis fit into this pantheon.
The female form has played many roles, as shakti, as the goddess of fertility etc. but strangely few temples have been completely dedicated to Her.



This temple, better known as the Chaunsath Yogini temple, finds other references in the 64 shrines found around Khajuraho. I do not think i am completely equiped to talk about the many forms of the Goddess, but I do know that there is something entirely strange about this temple.

For one, this temple follows none of the old canons of architecture precribed in the holy texts, but is built on a circular ground plan quite unlike all the other temples that are square or complex versions of it. The central platform, possibly a shrine in the olden days is square and has no roof. This temple is not apsidal, therefore it does not have any remote connection with Buddhist influences. Its therefore very clear that these temples attributed to the Mother Goddess, were restricted to themselves and were not half as popular and well known as temples associated with male deities. There is one thing about this temple though, its plan can be very clearly associated with the aniconic symbol of Shiva, The linga with emphasis placed on the Yoni aspect.

Other interesting feature around this temple are that every male deity except Shiva are replaced by a female counterpart including Ganesha. The temple also hosts forms of Bhairava and Chamunda, who are better known as the fierce forms of Shiva and Kali. There definitely has been a lot of tantrik practices that have been taking place here for sure.

One of the most interesting and unique sculptures found here is that of "Ekapada Shiva" or the one legged Shiva. He is also known as Ajaikapada Bhairava. There are only two references to the presence of such a form, one here in Orissa and the other very strangely at Shore temple Mahabalipuram.

All in all, what ever the current state of the temple, it would have been very interesting to see the original form of this temple in completion as well as the potent sacrifices that were done here and the rituals practised here to appease the Goddess Chamunda!

Interestingly Chamunda has always been associated with Bhairava, even in the Vittal Deol temple in Orissa, better known as a remote temple that performed strange human sacrifices to appease this fierce form of the Goddess.

He presents Himself

He presents Himself in the light
of the oil lamp
and yet i see only the darkness

He presents Himself like
a full bloom lotus
and yet i miss the fragrance

He presents Himself in
the twinkling stars
and yet i miss the glow in His third eye

He presents Himself with
the crescent moon
and yet i miss the calm silence

He presents Himself in
a firey dance
and yet i miss the madness

He presents himself with
grace within my mind
and yet i miss the rhythm

He presents Himself in
the chilling air
and yet i miss His warmth

He presents His knowledge
within His stony self
and yet i miss the wisdom

He presents Himself in
all nothingness
and yet i miss His truth

He presents Himself with
me through out my life
and yet i miss his presence

He presents Himself with
me in all completeness
and yet i feel the emptiness

He presents Himself here
to save me from me
and yet i dont see the difference.